Evaluation for Love

Upsale the Markdown

start with normalcy end with genious and the middle is all filler 

 

genius

welcoome home

where you belong

belong whats that mean 

welcome here and i hope you get the chance to leave 

your head

 under normal circumstances this is quite normal 

a few things to cover right quick 

  1. im listening to "weird classical music" 
  2. I planed to talk about certain things
  3. i plan to go into trance typing 
    1. typing with eyes closed
  4. this music is fuckin my head up 

I could add a link to said music here but that is doing too much..   you don't need to be in my life like that all that like back up..  it's making me hostile  

I could just turn off the music but im fascinated by the high vibration of the ordeal 

  • id like to focus less on the music 
  • id like to be a better speller 
    • no surprise there
  • id like to take a sip of water 

 

why we can't have nice things 

what it's like to carry secrets for no reason  ..   sully my good name that isn't good 

are you are someone you know 

j

I'ts supposed ot be so clear to you 

that i  am fucking with 

unsearious consern 

for imanginaary friends \

there is an event happening whenever you arent being aware 

mind fucking 

this music is getting to me again..   it's very disturbing..  I listened to 8 minutes of the 16 minute song before i skipped it.. 

i just meditated without you encringing on my thoughtwaves and it was legitamint 

 

nothing to report boss

everything is normal 

normal 

 

I am currently waiting until i get out of the spirit of reporting and sending messages before i start the trance typing...   I don't really want to have an agenda..   which reminds me that i was supoosed to talk about why we cant have nice things and being a predator..  The God Emperor was a predator..   a usurper tends to be good at being a predator..  

90j

I erased a sentence cus it made me look bad

I seem to feel bad about manipulations that others can track...   public manipulations i feel bad about cus i don't get a chance to feel bad about the black magic ..   anyway 

sometimes people have an idea that feels small and stupid and not ambisious aat all and i hear it and go wait if you take that to the extreme you could finally have fun  and sometimes it makes people change their own mind on the thing  they brought up..   

that was a horrible explanation 

 

I don't blame you for not continuing with me..  

welcome back welcome 

the music is wild and crazu and im in a mood to displease myself with half thought out premeses and low confidence in evil deeds 

 

what if ive lost coherence?/??  i used to be so smart durring my time loop 

 

 

the eyes are closing now..  

i typed that about ten minutes ago.. 

 honesty isn't walways best 

maybe the music is too much 

 

restart..   i have something to say most likely most probably i think..  

 

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my mind isn't free...    

im held down behind bars of safety..    ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

nothing is true..  my mind is too free..   im raised up by pilars of safety 

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i can't lay down and type this ..   but maybe i don't need to type anything at all..  

this  is somem  indecisive shiot 

 

 

subject is fully immersed in daydreams 

i wanted to start that off as some type of scientist where im checking in on myself doing an doignostic 

in reality that is whats happening currently..  im trysting myself to tell me how things are going and how things are preeved to be going and how i would like them to be going..  this is my evaluation on me..  

subject is not in daydreams but in the demiurge..   the creater of the universe is called demiurge and it's the god most people worship.. the creator..   so that part of myself is located somewhere in the heart chakera..   i decended from my crown or pineal   brow..  wither   and i went into the heart chakra to find a date..   a date to end the world with..   tutning from an alchemist and downgrading into a time traveler..  or a   sfdajfdsalkjfsdlkjfsdal kjfsa

a nmaij poiasj fasjo sdaf 

]'kpg  

fs'kp [kpasg o 

'kjga

a]sg]jop asgjoazg

a manipulator of the physical world..  tyring to manefest those epiritual powers ive thought to hard about..   

i make stage jokes about becoming a time travler because i can only love myself..   and im not just me im you so the you that realizes it's me is what im searching for and that makes me have a different perception and awareness than most. 

most time travelers have weird prioriteis..  

main point being that i don't like the phsyical world but im in here..   im trying to accomplish a goal..   and it's hard because the longer i stay here the more insane i become...   the phsyical corrupts..  

truth tries to sink it's babred teeth inside my neck ...  

instead of being the objective observer, things start to look more right and more wrong and more defined as being singular..   in other words it's harder to practice polarity..    the offests from being against the physical world to living inside it are not the only problems im facing here..  

the matrix is a good example of whats going on in my mind..   so im neo deciding to be plugged in for an extended amount of time to find my doppleganger..   

 

i typed some of this with open eyes but don't fault me for nothing 

 

one of the main things about being in the heart chakra rather than the lower three chakras is the accepting of humainty and becoming the christ..   the christ is just at the level to manipulate the physical world big time but still be conscerned with humanity and that's the tight rope that consumes most religious peeps.. 

who do i save why do i save them  when do i save them and how do i save them..    what do i do with all this power?!?!? 

that's the question most christ people ask..   

the smart me gives all that pwer internal..   until i thought it best to find my girlfirned..  and split the power between the phsyical reality and the metaphysical reality..   

but that comes with it's own thing..   idk    rituals and stuff should be involved..    like a real union of energies..   

a girlfriend without the ritual is just a target of hate misunderstanding and distrust 

a girlfriend who doesn't understand this or most of this or know herself is just a victim..  

my fire is an all consuming fire, but it's also a fire you can choose not to believe in..   

 

 

this ended up being complaining that i will look back upon as helpful to no one but myself..  

 

I know what i need the girl to do but what do i need to do myself?  prove my sanity?   I"M SANE I PROMISE  SO LET ME CONSUME YOU AND ILL GIvE YOU GODPOWERS before telling you how god is the enemy an shit cus the world is fucked and phsyical is an abomination that needs to be corrected..  lol 

no alarms and no surprises..  please..  

 

i need to go thorugh the inertial line flip into a reverse rollover halo wave..    I need to risk insanity and dive into a lady's life..    it's rude to assume that said lady doesn't know what shes asking for when she shows interest in a black hole such as myself..   I need to learn how to trust the demiurge!/!?!?!?/!/1/11!!!!!     FINALY REVELATIONS  

I need to learn to trust the me that is furthest from me and it will bring us cloer~?!!!  

Here I come baby ..   I'll go through God to get to you 

 

ive been dipping my toes into the phsyical world  testing out truthes and opinions..   I need to descend some more chakras   bring it to the root 

maybe let my truth be the truth of self honesty and self love ..    secretly knowing deception and hatred   and that will electromagnet me some gold  

ooo   what about the truthes of honesty and self hatred secretly knowing deception and self love

that sounds like it could hook me a big one.. 

 

 

 

I'm just realizing now that in the real world this is not the time for this blog at all..   good thing no one reads these things..     I just booked a comedy show with a bunch of ladies performing..   it's like so what is that supposed to stop me from being me in this moment..  do i gotta wait until it's cool to have an opinion cus that's weird..   

im not a good person..   i don't like people   but what's high up on my list of good qualities is a comedian.. they are my favorite types of people..   another thing high up on my list of good qualities is female ..  chaos is feminine and that's the greatest thing out there in existance..   so female comedians are of the highest esteem.   

now i made it totally weird..   or did i? 

 

i gotta end this but i don't want to because i want to somehow explain the parts that don't make me look good 

and thats what sucks about trying to trust the demeurge..   maybe if i start calling it god or something it would be easier to trust it...    I don't trust that you are showing me in the right light god..   you better be doing your fucking job or i will destrooy you